I confided in a friend the other day. She is a dear sweet young angel with a loving husband and great kids. I confided in her because, although I am as old as her mother, I can see myself in her. I confided in her because I know she looks to me for advice as someone whom she admires. I confided in her because I … Continue reading Seeing myself in her….
My journey of sobriety is a rather selfish one, where I find myself focused on my needs before anyone else’s. This is a strange sensation for me as I tend to put myself and my needs last, behind those of my child, husband, family and friends. Self care is actually an important part of an alcoholic’s healing journey. By nature, an alcoholic generally does not … Continue reading Becoming selfish….
My fractured Lent began nine years ago when I gave up wine for Lent, almost seven weeks after my mother died. At the time, I knew I was drinking too much. I knew ending each day in a haze of wine was not helping my grief. I thought that giving it up for Lent would allow me to break my pattern and move on. Trouble … Continue reading A fractured Lent
I knew it was only a matter of time until my sobriety would be tested in the face of bad news, or a difficult situation, or a major life stress. She has cancer, again. We met in college. We’ve been there for each other through all the milestones of life, celebrating, supporting, crying, and laughing. While we live too far from one another to just … Continue reading The 7:30 pm call….
The other day I laughed out loud. I don’t remember what was so funny, but it was said by my daughter, and I laughed out loud. The kind of laugh I have not experienced for a very long time. Truly, I cannot remember the last time I really laughed. The vibration of the sound nourished my soul. It filled me in an unexpected way. I’ve … Continue reading The sound of her laugh…
If you are in the US and watch any TV you know of, or have seen, the show This Is Us. TV so brilliantly written and produced you feel as if the creative team has been listening to your heart and reading your mind as they developed each episode. I won’t include any spoilers for those who might want to watch, but I do have a … Continue reading … time to exhale.
As a newly admitted alcoholic, I face tests and pass milestones every single day. Some are big, some little. Simply counting the days is a milestone. I wonder if, years from now, alcohol will not be so present in my mind all the time, or if the thoughts of it will shift back into the shadows of my brain; there, but not so dominantly present. … Continue reading Lessons in milestones…
Last night I prepared dinner for myself while my family was off doing other things. I love to cook! I love reading recipes, and changing them. Sometimes I follow them exactly as written one time and, based upon the results, I make my own tweaks and changes the next time I make it. I also love looking in my fridge and pulling together a meal … Continue reading Human cravings…
… or does it? I’ve never liked reading those words in advertising. Whatever they were selling, it never seemed to fit ME. I’m not sure who “all” is, but it isn’t me. This morning I reflected on several conversations I’ve had this week with people in and out of AA; all of whom are supportive and encouraging of my journey of sobriety, health and rediscovering … Continue reading One Size Fits All…
Seven days since my declaration. Seven days as an alcoholic. Seven days that have been filled with trials, and joys, and victories, and clear messages from God that I am Loved and doing the right thing. Today I went back to my Wednesday meeting. I have not been to a meeting since last week, blogging has been my “sharing” time, and I’ve meet with a … Continue reading Gratitude
Tidbits of Thoughts and Tastes 