In AA we are taught to take life “one day at a time”. Well, I’ve got that down. I can do my days, sun shining or rain falling, days I can do. Move forward, check the list, one task after another, even those days that I’m quiet and reflective, days I can do. But nights are a different story. As the energy of activity winds … Continue reading …one at a time
When your bottom is not deep, it is easy to see over the edge where people gather in joyful celebration. When your bottom is not deep, it is easy to see the horizon where the sun glistens on a cool and inviting river of wine. When your bottom is not deep, it is easy to hear the voices in the breeze telling you … Continue reading …the bottom
I stumbled on a video yesterday, the morning of July 4th. While it felt like a random encounter, I know God placed it in my path to find, saying “Watch This”, on a day when I would be able to receive the messages it contained. The video was actually produced and aired about 9 months ago, but I was drinking then, and I didn’t see … Continue reading Watch this….
Why does any given day matter more than any other? How can we imagine one day will feel different just because it is the day on which we were born? How can we expect people to act differently toward us on one particular day than they do on any other day? Why do we even make a big deal about birthdays? It’s just a day. So … Continue reading It’s just a day…
A few years ago, I spent a long afternoon sorting through boxes of childhood and school memories. I came across a folder of papers I had written for various high school and college classes; my own personal “Best Of” file. Sitting on the cold basement floor, I opened the brittle manila folder, one with the 1/3 tabs across the side, and started reading. My eyes … Continue reading Looking back in time….
I recall a counselor once telling me, in her experience if a person questions if they are drinking too much then they likely are. But are you an alcoholic? Only you can answer that, she said. The problem, as I see it, with the disease of alcoholism is there is no medical test that proves you are an alcoholic. Scientists have created tests that show … Continue reading Getting off the train…
We each have our own unique story and our own particular needs. What happens when an alcoholic goes to a meeting and the discussion causes pain or distress? What happens when the place that is supposed to be building us up actually tears us down? Out of the corner of my eye I see her shudder and her face crumple. I want to take her … Continue reading Finding my own path….
My fractured Lent began nine years ago when I gave up wine for Lent, almost seven weeks after my mother died. At the time, I knew I was drinking too much. I knew ending each day in a haze of wine was not helping my grief. I thought that giving it up for Lent would allow me to break my pattern and move on. Trouble … Continue reading A fractured Lent
If you are in the US and watch any TV you know of, or have seen, the show This Is Us. TV so brilliantly written and produced you feel as if the creative team has been listening to your heart and reading your mind as they developed each episode. I won’t include any spoilers for those who might want to watch, but I do have a … Continue reading … time to exhale.
… or does it? I’ve never liked reading those words in advertising. Whatever they were selling, it never seemed to fit ME. I’m not sure who “all” is, but it isn’t me. This morning I reflected on several conversations I’ve had this week with people in and out of AA; all of whom are supportive and encouraging of my journey of sobriety, health and rediscovering … Continue reading One Size Fits All…